8 clearing rituals to keep your giving tank full.
Like most other empaths and HSPs, I’ve spent my whole life caring for others.
I’ve also spent my life fighting fatigue and depletion, desperate for ways to replenish my physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual energy.
I’m the oldest of four siblings and the first of 13 grandchildren. Being the oldest meant I was the go-to family and neighborhood babysitter, advice-giver, and mother hen of my friend’s circle in my early and late teens and nurturer and caretaker to everyone that crossed my path.
3 ways I serve my anxiety that have saved my fearful ass — every time.
I thank my lucky stars I was born an anxious, colicky mess.
No really, I do.
If you think I’m crazy for loving my anxiety, then stop reading.
No, I mean it. Stop.
If you’re cursing your own anxious nature with made-up profanities, because the regular, run-of-the-mill curse words are used up, then read on. I got you.
4 uncomfortably comfortable truths of highly sensitive people.
I think I became highly sensitive in my mother’s womb.
She was loud and impulsive and very uncomfortable in her own skin. She was one of those sensitive people that pretend they can handle anything. She put on a tough girl suit whenever she showed her face in public — but in those quiet moments, she was a frightened little girl hiding behind the living room chair. Being in the womb, I sensed all that — and more. As a fetus, I learned this world was an overwhelming, sometimes frightening place.
According to Dr. Elaine Aron’s research, Highly Sensitive People (HSP’s), make up 20% of the population. When you’re highly sensitive, the world is often chaotic, a jumbled maze of noise. When 80% of that world operates on a different frequency, the world suddenly becomes as loud as a death metal concert to a newborn baby. If you’re not sure if you’re highly sensitive Dr. Aron has a quick and easy online test to determine if you’re an HSP.
Screw a college degree. Find a kid who knows nothing but the moment and study them up.
The year that old dude (well, he was old to me) wrote that bestseller about learning all you needed to know in kindergarten, I was overstuffing my brain with college wisdom.
I rolled my eyes at Robert Fulgham’s simple truths while sacrificing many, many precious trees to fill notecard upon notecard with endless biology facts. I filled many paper cups with vending machine coffee while yawning my way through Dickens and Tolstoy. I turned a blind eye at free-spirited children’s laughter and squeals in the park I ran laps in until my legs gave out.
Only read this if you’re serious about change. If you’re not, read on. There’s plenty of other entertaining articles on Medium to keep your mind occupied.
My inner abuser wrote the subtitle.
She’s got a love for all things S&M. She’s unkind in a playful way (but actually means it). My inner abuser is genuinely nasty and overly dramatic about it.
We all have an inner abuser.
I know that’s a harsh word, but I’m talking about that harsh voice that uses abusive statements to get our attention. Statements that, if said to you by an outsider, you’d label as verbal or emotional abuse.
That inner judge has something to teach you; listen.
I’ve spent years working on loving myself more. It sounds silly when I write it out.
Working on self-love sounds like a job — a hard job you don’t get paid for. A job that shouldn’t be a job and shouldn’t be hard. Self-love is something that should be natural. Shouldn’t it?
Image: Author’s own.
To this day.
Words from a former quitter.
I spent my life quitting. I quit jobs, relationships, school. Hitting walls made me want to run. So I did. I ran so quickly I never had a proper chance to say goodbye.
I’ve shunned goodbyes. They are emotional and uncomfortable. They can be messy and embarrassing. Goodbye means you’re done. Endings haven’t seemed worth the effort — until recently.
A single mom self-employed for a decade as a yoga and mindfulness teacher, I went back to school and pursued my Master’s in counseling degree 2 years ago. I graduated in this past August with my degree and started my first position in September.
Maybe you’re doing enough. Maybe every action you take is the right action for your soul.
Over three years ago I made one of the biggest decisions of my adult life: I let go of my small business and I enrolled in graduate school. My fearful self told me I was signing up for years of debt, nonstop work — aka more stress. I chose to shift careers at the age of 37. A single parent. A self employed yoga and mindfulness instructor. A budding self-help writer,on her way to being one of Elephant Journal’s featured writers. Creativity-wise, I was swimming freely in the pool of my soul’s deepest dreams. I wasn’t making a ton of money, but I was content — maybe even what some might call happy.
I’d spent over a decade “doing the work” — going within and peeling away layers of old, stuck, limiting and life-sucking beliefs.
Soul Writer. Single Mama. Life ponderer. Nature Lover. Therapist. Introvert. HSP & Empath. Life is my playground and each day a blank canvas.